I know…I know…it’s been, like, six weeks. Sorry. There is more to come soon…but for now, just a quick story.
I had the great privilege last weekend of participating in the wedding of some great friends, Drew Kreeger and Carolyn Nason. I recruited Drew to SPU back in the day, and he was in a small group I led for a few years while he was a student. He’s become a great friend. Carolyn, his lovely wife, is a gem as well. Their wedding was in Estes Park, Colorado, and they asked me to read a passage from 1 John.
Of course, I was nervous. Which is kind of crazy, because I’ve spoken in front of lots of people lots of times. But still, I felt insecure. I think it’s the whole seminary thing. I imagine that people have this really high expectation that I should emanate holiness and spiritual luminosity just because I’m studying theology. It’s not at all true, of course, but that’s what’s in my head. So, as I was reading over the passage before the wedding, I started wondering if I should say “This is the Word of the Lord” at the end. The Presbyterians (my peeps) do this, on occasion, and everyone in the church will respond by saying “Thanks be to God.” I like it…it’s one of those liturgical things that makes scripture feel really important and worthy of respect. But then, I wondered if that would seem pretentious. I mean, it’s not like I’m a priest or a pastor…I’m just some guy in theology school. And you know what they say: an ounce of pretense is worth a pound of manure. So, I was undecided. Should I go for the hoity-toity church talk and risk sounding ostentatious? Or should I just keep it simple, read the passage, and eat some wedding cake?
The scripture reading came right at the beginning of the ceremony. I walked to the microphone, opened my Bible, and started reading, still undecided about how I’d wrap things up. Mid-way through the passage, I was feeling good…feeling calm…and I told myself “Yes…you should go for it. You are a scripture-reading genius, and you should end with a bang.”
So I finished reading the passage, and then I said it.
“This is the Word of The God.”
The Word of The God? What is “The God”!?
Immediately after it escaped my lips, I realized I had blundered. What was worse was that I heard a few people in the crowd trying to figure out how to respond. ”Thanks be to…the…God?” It was disaster.
So, if The Drew and The Carolyn happen to be reading this as they lounge on a beach somewhere in The Greece, please accept my apology for being The Loser and messing up my one simple assignment. Luckily, your big day was exquisite, nonetheless.
Actually, we thought (you know since you are a seminarian and all and know what you are doing) that that is how we are supposed to refer to God now. So we have been.
The God bless you.
Dear The God…
Thank The God!
Oh my The God.
And… This is the word of The God.
This is so funny, thanks for making me laugh out loud on a really LONG day. So funny. Maybe because I totally get the presby thing. You are SO ready to be a pastor JJ.
JJ,
I too laughed out loud!! OMTG:)…anyways, thanks for the story.
Let’s talk soon.
this totally made my day.
Chances are, not very many people really heard it, paid attention, or are likely to remember it (unless they, like myself, stumbled across your blog!)…At a wedding, most people are directing their attention to other persons, like the bride and groom (especially if the wedding was exquisite!) not a lowly Scripture reader.
This is one of the best stories…I am totally GTM (giggling to myself). And, yes, I stalk your blog.
-The other JK
This is hysterical, JJ, thanks for a great laugh.
The Catholics (if I may be so bold as to represent them, these many, many years after I declined confirmation…) would like to say: Peace be with you.
Luckily, they were probably just staring into each other’s eyes and heard not a word of it…
…although the one thing I do remember from OUR wedding was when our minister/friend used the phrase “not just about hot love.” Oh, and the flower girls both had meltdowns. So maybe they will remember.
I laughed out loud…AND then I read it aloud for the enjoyment of others. THANKS for making us laugh! You have a gift.
JJ- I almost always laugh out loud when I read your blog…this was no exception. Thanks for sharing!
crying! YOu always deliver!
dear the jj,
thank you so much for reading the scripture of the god at the wedding. it was the best. i was so glad that the jj and the lisa could be in the colorado.
i wish that we had had more time for conversation and so on, but even so, it was fantastic to spend a bit of time with you guys.
it also meant so much to us that you did read. there is absolutely no need apologize…i’m sure that the god understands, and we hardly noticed!
i don’t know when…but we’re looking forward to the next time our paths cross! until then, be well!
drew~
I think you did fantastic.
The ceremony was absolutely gorgeous and I can only pray mine will some day be half as beautiful and full as love as the one Drew and Carolyn had.
<3 CVO
wow, I was standing up there and don’t even remember this happening.
It’s the fault of the crazy Catholics. They’re the ones who started with the “Word of the Lord” stuff.
-THE Daniel